I got to know one fine day that a boy of class X is seeing a girl past one month. His class mates and teachers started making fun of him. I was little skeptical once I got to know his name. “Oh my God, is it Sachin?” my jaw dropped and mouth was wide open. Since Sachin had been outstanding academically, how come he is indulging himself in all these things now? This is the best time to study and focus on the career. This will ruin him and his family.
I could not resist myself. I called him one fine day and spoke to him. He was hesitant to share with me anything on this matter initially, but being an educator and a mentor, I kept trying hard and finally I succeeded. He opened up and poured his heart out having tears in his eyes. I also controlled myself for a moment and listened to him patiently. He shared stuff about his family, his parents, siblings etc.
He comes from a financially sound background having an elder brother, who is preparing for civil services. The academic career of both the boys is excellent. Sachin’s father is a businessman and mother a house wife. His father remains busy with his work and naturally mother being a home maker, takes care of the house and the family members. His brother Nakul is busy with his coaching classes both online and offline throughout the day. Sachin also has coaching classes, but he finally reaches home in the evening and since then he is mostly found in his room. He does not have anyone to share the routine with, his feelings and emotions, how did he spend the day in the school etc. he desperately needs someone to share his thoughts with as he is just 16 years old. During this adolescent age lots of physical and mental changes take place. This age is full of a Roller-coaster ride on a daily basis. Boys and girls feel nostalgic and have lots of energy which they try to pour out in the form of any hobby or mode of interest like singing, dancing, playing, doing Yoga and meditation, watching movies, listening to music, hanging out with friends and sharing their thoughts and emotions.
But Sachin is not much interested in any such hobby. He is shy, little introvert and is attracted rather infatuated towards a girl of his class. This is a natural feeling at this age. Sachin just wants to be heard. He wants someone should listen about his inner feelings and emotions that he wishes to share. So, he anticipates Ria as his friend and shares his thoughts with her. In fact, Ria is not genuinely interested in him and his feelings. She admires him just because of his sound financial background.
In a nut shell, Sachin is blessed with wonderful parents, an elder brother and a positive atmosphere at home but still is in dearth of a well-wisher, a guide who can be a good friend to him.
Well, I could sense out the whole matter and spoke to him as per his convenience. He finally poured out his inner voice and shared things with me. Now, on and off he shares his achievements, his downfall, his anxieties, his stress, his happiness and his small and big achievement with me and is happy from within. He feels much relaxed and motivated after sharing. I could observe a great positive change in him. He resumed his studies and is quite confident that he will score good marks in the final exams. He has improved upon controlling his emotions and sentiments and feels much better than before.
Now just imagine, many “Sachins” must be wandering in our society struggling hard to control their feelings and emotions without any help or guidance. If we educators empathize with such youth then there will be no issues of anxiety and depression at such a tender age. There is no shame if you have girls and boys as your opposite gender friends, do share with them whatever is relevant but in a limit. One should not share anything or everything in a group of so-called friends. Of course, a best friend can be one or maximum two….just ensure they must be trustworthy.
I willingly do this exercise often to guide these youngsters and avoid letting them head towards wrong direction. And believe me, one or the other Sachin’s get facilitated by this approach. I feel glad that my real job is done. It gives me high level of satisfaction to see these young boys and girls, happy from within…..
Are you in contact with any such Sachin? What did you do to let him out of his pains? Do share if you feel like.
At the point of time when we have to focus on our career along with handling the emotional breakdowns and we don’t have anyone to share our emotions with is just suffocating…having someone with whom we can share our problems ,our feelings and everything without the fear of being judged and there is the hope that they will pass the positivity and help us to move in the right direction is nothing less than a blessing …
किसी राज़दार की जरूरत हर उम्र में हर किसी को होती है। होता यूं है कि मां बाप जो पुराने राज़दार होते हैं किसी कारण से अपनी अहमियत खो देते हैं,और हम ऐसे व्यक्ति पर भरोसा करने लगते हैं जो हमारी हां में हां मिलाता रहे। महिलाओं की एक पत्रिका में एक बच्चे ने अपना दुखड़ा रोया तो सलाहकार
ने कहा कि तेरे मां बाप तेरे लिए बहुत ही चिंतित हैं, इसलिए तुझे सलाह देते रहते हैं।यदि तू कुछ भी नहीं बन पाया तो तेरे इन दोस्तों को कोई भी फर्क नहीं पड़ेगा पर तुझे और तेरे मां बाप को जरूर फर्क पड़ेगा। मैं इस उत्तर की आज भी कायल हूं। स्मिता पंत ने बहुत ही सधी हुई भाषा में अपने विद्यार्थियों के अनुभव साझा किए हैं। आशा करती हूं कि ये बहुतों के काम आएंगे। निरंतर लिखने का प्रयास करती रहें।
Truly Relatable mam!
But Fs I know whom I have told what, & ig its more IMP to first get that Trust, which truly take years, rest is that exceptions just took us so far that we can’t say, when what happens! 🙄😅